what has happened and what the future holds

Honestly, terrible things have happened in my life in these months passed.


My girlfriend and I of many years broke up. I really felt as if someone had died and, honestly, I was in mourning for many months. Kept having these images, dreams and flashbacks. Almost drove myself insane. After a while, I realized that she is alive and well and even went on a new year's vacation with some other guy. Helped me to start moving at snail pace.

My job went south cause of politics and random old men who are too old to understand when things change. Last year, I had spent all my heart and soul trying to make things work for my team. Just gave it all I had and my ignorant boss thought we all faltered. Idiot.

My knee was busted in a half marathon in Feb and I was not able to workout for 2 months. This is after I spent January running 7 miles a day. I was hanging onto the only thing I had at that time. My health.

Thats the three things a man has in his life. Love, Career, and Health. All were gone.

Then came Hawaii...

For the first time, I felt like I found someone I could fall in love with again. It was all based on friendship. I didn't even touch her, but my heart was beating again!! First time in a LONG time. Its pretty confusing that I am leaving so I decide not to mess with her life. I am totally alone and totally unattached. Yes, I am a wanderer.

For the first time, I saw the bigger picture in my career. I used to take on my goals like my destiny, but they aren't. They are just numbers. I have a HUGE heart and I can take a fall. My ability is way beyond where I am working now. I need to put myself in a spot where I want to be. Thats my goal when I get back.

For the first time in 2 months. I went all out 30 days of excercise. The trend is on my side now. I am going to go on a super healthy diet to get myself back to the old me.

I have more to write tomorrow. Good night.

Trip is over

I have no words

Starbucks Iced Green Tea - Sweetened

My people (that means you), you all have to go to starbucks and try the Iced Green Tea. Tell them sweetened, not stirred. It is the most refreshing drink I have had in a long time. Its is so good and so sweet and so EXCELLENT! I am sipping on it right now. One sec... AHHHHHH, so good.

Eyes Wide Shut

Look at this! I am person number nine. Whats up with people? Why do they need to be with someone? Well, its the meaning of life. Finding someone we love and leaving our children to carry on our genes is what nature intended for us. Our society makes that fundamental truth seem like a path that is boring and something "everyone does anyway." Although, if you ask anyone who has had kids and is in a good marraige, they are the HAPPIEST people you'll meet. As mundane as that sounds, its what we are here for. Now, with that said, I am not ready for marraige (I can't even spell it) and kids. My logic is that you have to go step by step. First I gotta find someone I can LOVE and TRUST and someone who'll do the SAME for me. Only then I can move forward to the next steps. So after more than 6 months after my last relationship, I sincerely want to be with someone. I want to be with a girl who'll bring me a piece of mind. I want to be with a girl who'll let me live and I'll let her live. A girl who's honest and compassionate. A girl who's absolutely beautiful ... to me, inside and out.

There was only one girl who had a chance at my heart even when it was CLOSED! I can't figure out why that was the case. If you are reading this, I hope it puts a smile on your face. I'll see you soon.

I can't believe I have to leave Oahu soon!

My days have been so packed, I can't believe I have spent 22 days here already!! Yesterday, I made a new friend at dinner and he HOOKED ME UP with three big things. I am about to leave in a few minutes to get scuba diving certified! Diving is such a thrill and its also like meditation. You get to see a different world. This world is not only beautiful, but its based on just instincts. That means I have to also work on instincts. There's no emotions there! This is good for me cause I don't follow my instincts all the time and let things go by. I have one big mistake I made just the night before I went on sabbatical where I didn't follow my instincts. Its not looking good for me. She's off somewhere else and seems to have forgotten about me already :-).

Tomorrow, I am going to go surfing (duh), but I am also going to go to Parkour class. They are going to teach about doing stunts. http://youtube.com/watch?v=jquXcwooV6A

On Saturday, I am going to try out crossfit. Its a gym that focuses on pure power building. Thats what I want!! Soon (than later) I am going to be JACKED!

Lets go of your limits

Yesterday, I jumped off a 25 feet high cliff. Few years ago, I would have never jumped, but within a few minutes of standing next to the edge and admiring the view, I was airborne.

Breaking limits that you have set for yourself is one of the toughest parts of life. Even little ones. I believe that personal satisfaction in life is directly related to your self worth. Your self worth keeps growing as you keep moving your limits. You keep reaching new levels. And the great part is that the more you break your limits, the EASIER is becomes.

Isn't this interesting?

Check out this picture I took while leaving Kauai. There's a car in the way and you can see the streaking headlights. BUT the license plate shows up like it didn't move!!!

Wow, the magic of Kauai.

Going to North Shore of the island tomorrow. Going to check out all the sights and go on a 4 hr kayaking trip on Kahana bay!! I love kayaking!